Management Craft

Final Blog Post - The Five Most Important Beliefs for #Management and #Leadership

This will be the last blog post I do for the foreseeable future. I will not bore you here with the “why," but if you are interested I have included a bit more about my reasons at the bottom of this post.

I have distilled the essence of great leadership and management into five beliefs. Take on and act based on these beliefs and you will lead well. I promise! I have been observing and learning from the best leaders for 30 years, have held leadership positions for nearly 25 years and have written about management and leadership for 15 years. I have seen great leaders transform organizations and I have seen terrible leaders suck the life out of workplaces. I know you want to be transformative!

These five beliefs reside deep inside the very best leaders I have had the pleasure to work with over the years.

Five Beliefs at the Core of Great Leadership

1. We are highly talented and highly flawed. This belief should lead to two actions – greatness and tolerance. 1) You are amazing – so go BE amazing. Your organization needs that and you need it (don't be a Greyhound who never runs). 2) Chill out and be tolerant. You drive half the people around you a little nutty and others will irk you on occasion. Never let personality or style get in the way of working well with others. I am not suggesting you put up with abuse – but most of what irks us is just a clash in style.

2. Management is a social act – it occurs in conversation. Being able to cultivate and catalyze productive and progressive conversations is your currency for getting things done. If you are lacking progress, get people talking.

3. There is big power in small actions. Generating breakthroughs starts with tiny actions that reverberate, build, and then go BAM!! Almost every great outcome started with a tiny act. Take small actions every day in the service of your goals. You will make things happen. For more on this, see my post about the Butterfly Effect here.

4. Calm and persistent is the way to go. No one wants to follow a leader who runs around like his/her hair is on fire. No one wants to follow someone who does not follow through. Be strong, but don’t generate negative drama. Be like a redwood tree – strong, flexible, and a positive force.

5. Leading people is a privilege. You affect people’s lives every day – positively or negatively. Your actions can help people do their best work or send them to drink due to stress and boredom. Leading people is an awesome opportunity – act like you have won the job lottery every day (you have). Go forth and conquer with confidence and grace.

These five beliefs will help you with all the opportunities and challenges you face as a leader. These beliefs are the most important for us to take on and model, in my humble opinion. It all starts here.

Thank you for being a part of the Management Craft community. It is because of you, my dear readers, that being the voice of Management Craft has been a great experience.

If you would like to refer back to the very best posts from the blog, or share them with others, please consider picking up a copy of my “best of” book called, Never Ending New Beginnings. You can find it here and I really appreciate your support. This book brings together my best business writing.

Cheers and happy new year! Go 2013 and beyond!

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Why I am retiring the blog:

If you have been reading this blog for some time, you know I have incurable medullary thyroid cancer. Since my diagnosis and initial surgery, I have changed many things about the way I live and how I spend time. Top on my priority list was to stop the road warrior life of a global consultant and to focus more on health and balance. I loved the work but hated the stressful travel and the loss of leisure time.

I have returned to an internal organization development role for a large organization here in Houston. I get to do interesting work and do not have to travel. It’s just what I need. I will still do the occasional conference speech but will not be consulting any longer. And because I have a “real job” now, I am much more choosy about how I spend my nights and weekends.

Blogging about management is just not making it to the top of my list. I have not been giving this blog the attention any blog deserves.

I feel fine and am living an active life, but I have this “stuff” inside of me that could make things real crummy in the future. Hopefully not too soon, but there is no way of knowing and so in the mean time I am going to live like my life depends on it – diet, exercise, relaxation and enjoying the present. I get scanned at MD Anderson every few months to monitor what's going on with the cancer. Talk about test anxiety! :-)

Let’s stay in touch through email and Facebook, OK? I don’t want to say goodbye to you all, I just don’t want to feel obligated to keep up this blog.

Thank you, thank you, thank you for your interest in my work through the years.

Keep it Simple - Reflections from Scotland

Bill and I spent the last 10 days in Scotland. Hiking in the highlands, discovering ancient pubs and little known whiskies, and soaking in the Scottish way.

I am still jet lagged but I want to make sure and remember one important impression, even lesson. Simple can be good. We can say and do this in many ways. It happens when people choose to be picky/deliberate about a few things that are important but then being flexible about most everything else.

For example, one of our drivers was formerly a head chef. But he and his wife wanted to live in a particular small town. If you want to live in a small town, you might need to be ready to take most any job. The life is the ends that justifies the means.

Here is another example. We stayed at a small Inn owned by two art lovers. The place was cool and inspiring. It had other quirks and more than a few imperfections but was beautiful and felt oddly complete and right.

The grocery stores offer fewer options, but always a few interesting ones.

Life can be hard, but instead of trying to engineer all the hard out of it (strikes me that this would be the American approach, to tackle it all), they embrace it and build strength where it is most needed and important.

A good day is one that ends with a lively conversation with mates and a wee dram of fine whisky trickling to the back of our mouths. Warming our day and fueling contentment.

Simple works well. I am learning this lesson late but am glad I am learning it. If we choose what's important - if we obsess in the direction of our interests - then we can reduce a lot of stress and worry about things that don't matter - should not matter - can't be affected even if they do matter.

It's time to do fewer things and do them well. Really. I mean it. This is something we say but few of us do this well or are able to sell the idea at work. We should try harder and try again. I was talking to a leader a couple of weeks ago about this. He made some offhand comment about how doing fewer things well is a nice concept but a fairy tale. I assured him I was serious and made the case that it's the only thing that might really work - spreading our efforts so thin that there is no depth does not work and we know it.

I enjoyed Scotland a lot. I dig the vibe. The honest way of living and how each person sems driven by a couple of priorities, but not too many. 

Are you a statistic or an outlier?

I was reading a post from a friend and want to share this line from his post:

"I am not just a statistic, provided I do what it takes to be an outlier."

I love the way he put this. It is so true, too. Are you being - I mean being, like how you are living in this moment - a statistic or an outlier? What are the outliers doing that is different? This is a provocative question and one we can all learn from.

Sometimes I feel like I am being - acting in this moment - like an outlier. Too often, though, I am like many.....floating along, living more in "wishful thinking" mode than "gettin' her done" mode.

As someone with big goals and vivid dreams - I would serve my intentions well to align my actions a bit better and ramp up my clarity and focus.

As someone living with cancer - I would serve my goals well to not let time dull my resolve and commitment. I must admit I feel like the last couple of months have not been my best in this regard.

I love the way my friend put this personal challenge out there - actually it is a simple acknowledgement of what is. Today's outcomes are the result of yesterday's actions. Today's actions will generate the future. Let's make sure our future is filled with amazing surprises, positive breakthroughs, and outlier outstanding performance.

And the antidote to envy is.......

To envy is human. But envy robs us of so many possibilities including:

• Achievement.
• Peace.
• Humility.
• Connection.
• Happiness.
• Our best thinking, our best work, our best life.

So how do we get past our feelings of envy? To explore this, we need to think about what's going on when we experience envy. Envy occurs when we compare ourselves to others and when we feel unsatisfied, outdone, or a lack of confidence. Comparison and regret.

What's the antidote, then? You can't make a chocolate cake without chocolate. Remove either the comparison or the regret and you will prevent envy. And here is a fool proof way to quickly transition out of feelings of envy.

Become a fan. Instead of comparing yourself to someone else, show admiration. Give congratulations. Take the initiative to show support. Don't do this for show, become a fan for real. Shift your thinking from regret to being a fan and you will zap envy in its tracks. It can happen very quickly but only if you are sincere.

Envy is a killer. Envy will get in the way of your goals and dreams. Make it go away. Poof!

Acting Without Self-Consciousness - My Ongoing Experiment

A few weeks ago I wrote about the idea of authenticity and how acting without self-consciousness was at the heart of it. Since then, I have been experimenting with the idea of self-consciousness. I have been:

• Noticing when self-consciousness occurs.
• I have been testing ways to talk myself away from feeling self-conscious.
• And I have been noticing my results.

Here is my conclusion. This is more powerful and simple than I would have imagined. Let's start with the simple part - noticing self-consciousness.

The feeling of being self-conscious comes up as we are planning to do something or just getting started. They are those little thoughts that trail into our minds and create worry, fret, or apprehension. Many of these thoughts have some merit and many do not. But even those with some logical basis might not be helpful. Here is a rather graphic example that I bet we can all relate to:

• Action: Signing up for a Pilates or Yoga class.
• Self-conscious thought: Worrying about passing gas.

Face it, when bending one's body into pretzel-like shapes, the likelihood of provoking the release of gas is higher. This worry has merit especially if you have consumed foods and drinks that cause gas.

At work, similar situations occur. Prior to a meeting, or during it, we might feel a tinge of self-consciousness before deciding whether to bring up a difficult topic. You might be judged, shot down, or get an unfavorable response from the boss. It could happen! It does happen!

And we all pass gas. So we should not do the Pilates?

No, that would be a cop out and inauthentic to our intentions.

Notice. Choose. Move forward.

When we notice these human moments we enable ourselves to make some choices. Sometimes we will hold back. If we can talk ourselves through the apprehension, new things are possible.

It is not all about talk. We can take actions to reduce the feared negative outcome. We can change our diets prior to the Pilates class. And we can prepare more fully for the meeting. We can think about how we might say something so it is heard as we intend it.

Over that last several weeks I have been noticing when I have thoughts of self-consciousness and making the choice to talk myself out of the fear and take action that moves me forward. I have done this at least a few dozen times and I am very pleased with the results. I might need to remind myself (often repeating the mantra, "without self-consciousness, without self-consciousness") a few times to stay in action, but it works. It really works.

I invite you to notice your moments of self-consciousness and get through them at least some of the time. As a manager, there are many aspects of your work that will provoke self-doubt. It is natural. But being authentic means that we are willing to act consistently with our intentions without self-consciousness.

BTW: I am not suggesting that we disable our filters. This is not a post about being irresponsible and immature (which is the definition of having no filters). Acting without self-consciousness is about removing our self-imposed barriers to manifesting our intentions.

Repeat the mantra if that helps. "Without self-consciousness, without self-consciousness.."

One more observtion. People notice us less than we think. People think about us less than we think. Most of our little worries are silly because no one is paying attention. You are not the only one at the Pilates class who worries about passing gas. And when you do - and we all will at some point - it will be no big deal. We will not have to leave the class in shame. The earth will not start spinning in a different direction. This I know for sure.

Five Awesome Things At Work

Inspired by the "Awesome" guy (Neil Pasricha) - great TED Talk, one of my faves - here are a few small things that can make the work day super awesome.

• Getting into the office and seeing that the two-hour meeting you were dreading has been cancelled. Score!
• Being the one to bring in a box of donuts, or scones, or whatever, and seeing the delight on your team members' faces. Extra awesome: catching someone going for his/her second donut and laughing about it.
• Sharing an idea and being told to, "go for it." Extra awesome: when you "go for it" and make something happen.
• The moment after you talk yourself down from worrying about something that you do not need to worry about.
• Cleaning out your in box.

What are your awesome moments? How might you create and/or enjoy a few today? And if you need a booster shot (remedial training on how to experience big enjoyment from small moments) watch Neil's TEd talk here.

As a manager, how might you be the producer of awesome moments? How might your team members asnwer: "It's awesome when my manager __________." Go do that.

The World We Encounter - The Case for Rose Colored Glasses

Photo Credit - Beagle Rescue

I dig this quote from the book, How to Be an Existentialist by Gary Cox:

"We constantly encounter a world characterized and defined by the motives and attitudes we choose to have and the evaluations we choose to make."

I think this is true. And it is an opportunity to see people and situations in their best light. Believe people are amazing and you will see them do amazing things. Remind yourself of the gifts your team members possess and you will see these gifts come forth in their work. Assume the best intentions and experience the compelling reasons people do what they do.

The reverse is true, too. Be can bungle up our situation really fast by believing it is messed up.

This is not about flying blind - or being bamboozled by a cruel world. Our thoughts don't just determine what we see, they determine what happens next. Our beliefs, thoughts, assumptions, and mindsets CHANGE and AFFECT people and what they DO.

Choose the context that will best serve you and your goal.

I was doing a team retreat a couple of weeks ago and this idea came up. The group struggled with sandbox issues and the communication issues that sandbox issues can cause (see my previous post about sandboxes here). But what if we did not see the sandbox? What if we never assume a territory? The way we see these issues changes them.

How can you use this to get your week off to a great start?

Survive and Thrive; 10 Life Lessons from Motorcycles

Check out this cool article that links life, success, and one of my favorite things - motorcycles - from Liz Jansen. Liz has put together a super interesting book called Women, Motorcycles and the Road to Empowerment  that includes a collection of inspiring pieces from dozens of hip motorcycle chicks.

Survive and Thrive; 10 Life Lessons from Motorcycles

by Liz Jansen

Motorcycles and our relationship with them, have much to teach us, whether we ride or not. As Women, Motorcycles and the Road to Empowerment describes, “The partnership of rider and machine when they join together in perfect harmony is like observing a beautiful dance that gives birth to power, strength, balance and positive change.”

Vulnerability makes motorcycles masters at teaching us vivid, universal lessons about life. Misinterpret or ignore signs while riding and the immediacy and potential severity of the outcome are irrefutable. But the rewards from learning to recognize and overcome these challenges are matchless. Just like life.

 Here are 10 areas of vulnerability through which we learn strength.

 Vision.

 Our eyes steer the bike. This fundamental skill pervades all others. We want to look in the direction we want to go because our eyes will certainly take us there. If we allow our eyes to focus on something other than the road ahead, that’s where we’ll go.

Having a vision and keeping it in sight draws us towards it. There are many other demands that divert our time and resources. They may seem like a short-term priority but in reality, they’re not aligned with long-term success.

 Communication.

Headlights, brake lights, turn signals and horn indicate our approach and intended action, especially if the change is sudden. Being visually conspicuous can catch the eye of other drivers and prevent a collision.

How we communicate with each other is fundamental for maintaining healthy personal and professional relationships. This can be a life-long lesson, especially in our multi-cultural, multi-technology and multi-generational settings. Communicating our intentions and confirming our intent is understood goes a long way in collision avoidance.

 Decision Making.

Sometimes we can’t see around the corner and we have to make a decision based on the best information we have. It doesn’t deter us from proceeding, we just need to learn how to manage the risk.

Being prepared for the unexpected, remaining flexible, resourceful and creative all make for smoother transitions when the unexpected happens, as it invariably will.

Weather.

In a car you don’t think twice, but on a motorcycle, you take a keen interest in the weather. Wearing or carrying gear that allows you to adapt, increases the comfort, safety and enjoyment of your ride. Riding in inclement weather requires skill, confidence, physical and emotional stamina.

Storms blow up in life too and our environment changes. Anticipating what’s to come, preparing for it and not taking it personally make it much easier to manage with minimal disruption.

In both cases, we often worry needlessly about something that never happens.

 Energy.

Gas tanks have a finite capacity for fuel. Most bikes have an indicator to alert you that it’s time to fill up. Ignoring this warning sign for long enough will leave you stranded.

We too receive warning signs when it’s time to fuel up. The problem is, they’re often less obvious and easier to ignore. As we become more self-aware and intuitively astute, we recognize the signs earlier and can take proactive measures.

 Balance.

A lopsided load makes the motorcycle harder to handle, affects performance and requires more energy from the rider. Prioritizing what you take, being creative, keeping the weight and center of gravity low and close to midline makes the weight easier to manage.

Taking on additional responsibilities, whether we choose them or the Universe delivers them to us, can create stress, anxiety, fatigue and illness. Learning to recognize the signs, drawing on alternative resources and jettisoning that which isn’t necessary alleviates the pressure.

 Skills.

Like our motorcycles when they’re stored for long periods, skills get rusty after periods of inactivity. Before hopping on the bike for that first ride of the season, it’s important to practice and get the feel of the controls again. Periodic skill refreshers correct bad habits we’ve picked up and prepare us for more challenging situations – and new adventures!

Staying current keeps us vibrant and marketable. Our world changes very quickly and if we intend to be engaged in it, continuous learning is part of the curriculum.

 Interdependence.

A motorcycle relies on its operator for instruction and direction. Without a rider, the bike just sits there. And without a bike…..it’s a long walk.

 Strong business and personal relationships help us and our businesses thrive. We bring unique skills and attributes to any relationship, making us stronger and more effective together. An interdependent relationship is far more fulfilling than one where partners are independent or dependent.

 Awareness.

 While riding, we continuously scan our environment while concurrently receiving signals through our senses on road surface conditions, posted signs, traffic, weather and other potential hazards. We are gifted with additional sounds, smells and sensations we miss when traveling with a metal cage around us. Being open to inputs, allows us to make appropriate and necessary adjustments to prepare for the road ahead.

 Other people act as our mirrors. While we may not always agree, listening to their feedback teaches us about ourselves. We make our own choices but often others see things that we don’t. Ultimately, listening to our intuition after it’s processed the inputs, is our best guide.

 Maintenance.

 Routine inspections and preventative maintenance reduce premature wear, enhance performance and promote safety.

 Body, mind and soul are no different. They need regular care and nourishment to function optimally and allow us to flourish.

 Liz Jansen is an author, speaker, coach, adventurer – and motorcycle aficionado. Her book Women, Motorcycles and the Road to Empowerment draws on stories from a diverse group of fifty women to illustrate lessons of self-discovery and adventure. Liz creates events, retreats and workshops, focused on personal growth, leadership and adventure – and motorcycles are often included. She has appeared on TV and radio shows and written for numerous print and online publications, including her own website.  Follow her on Twitter or Linkedin.

 Print or kindle copies of  Women, Motorcycles and the Road to Empowerment can be purchased at Amazon here. 

Liz's Links

Website: http://www.lizjansen.com

Twitter: https://twitter.com/#!/trilliumliz

LinkedIn: http://www.linkedin.com/profile/view?id=6577297&trk=tab_pro

Do you really want it or are you wanting to want it? #management #happiness #authenticity

File this post in the category of personal success. Life success. Leading with authenticity.

First, I want to share a very important video. It is not short - just over a hour - but it could transform your life. The video is of Dr. Dean Ornish on the connection between how we live and our health. I watched it this weekend and found it riveting. And I am convinced that to be the best leaders we can possibly be, we need to be the best humans we can be. We need to be the fully expressed version of ourselves. Check out the video here.

Consider this example of authenticity: throwing yourself into whatever you dream without self-consciousness or regret.

There are two sticky parts to the above example. First, is the throwing of oneself into what we dream. I have been challenging myself a lot lately regarding my goals and dreams. I say I want to XYZ, but if I am honest, there are many signs that should tell me that I really don't want to do this. It is a goal I want to want. Something that I think would be interesting to want. But I have to push myself to get enthused about it.

Here is an example. I have been saying for many years that I wanted to get my PhD. I even enrolled in a great program and was underway. It was a slog for all the usual reasons including that I was working full time and trying to have a life. I thought this was normal and it is to a point. But even if I had all the time in the world it would be a slog. And now I can be at peace and tell you I really don't want a PhD. I wanted to want it. Quitting the program hurt because I had already made an investment. But is it ever right to continue spending time and money when it's no longer a goal? No, it is not (especially if you do not need the credential/outcome, which I don't).

I have been thinking about writing a quirky crime novel. I think it is a fun idea. But I am realizing that this might be another one of my wanting to wants, not a real want. What's the clue? I am not enthused to get into it. It is a slog even when I have the time.

I have decided that I will do only the following:

• Things I REALLY want to do
• Things I have to do to be a good citizen
• Things I choose to do to serve others

But I won't do

• Things I want to want to do, that upon reflection, I realize I don't want to do

I can't be authentic - throw myself into it - if I am trying to talk myself into the idea. There will be no room in my tiny brain to focus on making progress.

The second part of the example that is a bit tricky is "without self-consciousness or regret." Yikes, that is a hard but worthy endeavor. I have been working on this. Here is an ego-driven example. I have resisted doing a lot of biking because I was self-conscious about how my big butt must look from behind. So silly, really, especially since A) most people are not thinking of me when our paths cross, and thinking they are is pretty self-absorbed and B) who cares, it is big, which is why I need to bike more.

I have found that when I can adopt a less self-consious approach, I am better able to throw myself into things. It is a gift I can give myself that keeps on giving.

We are mental garbage making machines, aren't we? Success - which I define as fruitful happiness - comes when we can dial down our mental garbage long enough to let our talents manifest possibilities.

Enjoy the week. Throw yourself into something that really matters to you and don't worry if your butt looks big.

Remember when we were courageous? Seemingly fearless?

I was walking on the treadmill tonight while listening to my iPod. I have a playlist of up tempo songs great for walking. The song "Relax" came on from Frankie Goes to Hollywood. I thought about something I did when I was in my early 20s to this song...

Get your mind out of the gutter....

Before I tell you what I did, let me come clean and admit I was a serious disco queen. A total disco freak. I loved it all, especially the somewhat funky stuff like Depeche Mode, the Cure, Eurythmics, etc.. I also had a thing for Barry White, but who didn't?

One more thing before I tell you what I did to the song "Relax." Since I am confessing my dorky music tastes and seriously dating myself, let me say that I am a huge fan of Yanni. Yep. Oh, and John Tesh's sports anthems. And Enya. But I also like the Fray, Neon Trees, and My Chemical Romance if that helps.

Back to my story of courage...

I lived in Tampa when I was in my early 20s. I was going to college, was a waitress at a TGI Fridays and then a night audit manager at a hotel. I never had any money. I started driving a motorcycle because I could not afford a car (or a proper bike, mine was a piece of crap Honda 100 with one wobbly wheel). To make extra money, I entered dance contests. They were big in that day.

At first, I entered contests with some guy I met that night and we danced as a couple. Disco was great because, unlike ballroom or some other more coordinated dances, two people could do their own things and look like they were a pair. Dancing in a couple, we won about a 1/3 of the time. The total payout was usually $100, or $125 for the better competitions. Not bad!

I remember the first time I entered a dance contest without a guy. Just myself. The discotheque was packed. It was one of the nicer places in town, unlike the ABC Liquor Store bar I went to a lot because it was statistically easier to win the dance contests there (fewer people, drunker clientele). On this night, the place was nice ($150 prize, I think), the crowd was big and looked hip, and I could assume the competition would be tough.

So what made me think I could win against several pairs of dancers? What gave me the confidence to dance alone in front of a room full of judging eyes? I still don't know how I might have rationalized entering this contest. I talked myself into it - and, no, I was not drunk - and I entered as a single.

I got to pick my song and I selected "Relax" because of its great crescendos and thundering beat. Whenever any DJ put "Relax" on, I always danced to it - I knew every inflection point.

I danced my heart out - left it all out on the dance floor - no reservations.

I did not win.

After that night, I entered a few more contests on my own, I won only one (to the unlikely song, "Shock the Monkey" if I recall).

Thinking about it now - 25+ years later, I wonder where I got the courage to do it. Was I fearless then? Not at all - I can remember being filled with fear. But courage is not the absence of fear, it is acting in the face of it.

I want to tap into that more courageous Lisa more often.  And not just in a life-threatening situation, like a car accident. I want to be courageous and seemingly fearless when I don't need to be - like at the disco. It feels wowy, tingly. It's like ice cream AND the head freeze. The pain and pleasure of New Mexican green chiles. Lovely and overwhelming. I know the courageous Lisa is down here somewhere.

I bet you have your own story of the more courageous you. Reflect on that time and enjoy it again. Who were you being that you did that? What's going on in your life today that could use that YOU?

Food for thought. No go shake it.